I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize