You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
try to milk me bitch
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