there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
