Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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