wat bout pragnant strippers??
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
