i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
