I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
