who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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