We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
