fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
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