You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Even my vagina gasped.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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