i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
