Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize