Will you blow on my dice?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Randomize
