i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Randomize