oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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