Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I think my moral compass just broke
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