Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
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