I want to walk on stilts...naked
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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