Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
