If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
