I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
