he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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