Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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