I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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