i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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