if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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