Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
