I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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