My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
