Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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