haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
