your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
