So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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