apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
