carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You made out with two different species that night
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize