No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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