he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
