There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
