You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
