Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize