So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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