Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
