Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
