i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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