Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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