My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
