So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize