whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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