I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize